EP# 102 Ten Time Rules

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We all have rules that we live by. Sometimes, these rules serve us well, while at other times they might not. It’s a good idea to periodically question the rules you've set for yourself. Check if they remain relevant to where you want to take your business and life.

Ramit Sethi, founder of “I Will Teach You How to Be Rich,” lives by ten money rules. This made me think that we should all have time rules to ensure we make the most of the precious moments we have, treating time as the invaluable currency of life.

Many rules govern our perspectives on money. Similarly, we harbor many unconscious rules about time: how we perceive it, how we value it, and how we utilise it.

Common time adages include:

• The early bird catches the worm.

• There's an implied belief in the "4am club" that early risers are more successful.

• There's a great emphasis on being productive and not wasting time.

• Being punctual is heavily stressed.

We accept these rules because they have been ingrained in us for so long. Rarely do we question if they genuinely serve our quest to build the business or life we desire.

We're acutely aware of time's limitations. Yet, we might not recognize the self-imposed time constraints we've come to accept as truth. These rules often dictate our actions in both business and life. When our beliefs about time clash with our desires, it creates internal discord.

Time isn’t just about hours and minutes to me; it encompasses my emotional experiences and what I choose to focus on. 

Reflecting on how we want to employ this resource helps us evaluate if our beliefs about time align with our goals. We can then consciously select principles that resonate with our aspirations, allowing us to lead our days more authentically.

I've compiled my list of ten time rules. I'll delve into each rule's intent and share them with you. Hopefully, they inspire you to develop your own. 

Remember! There’s no definitive right or wrong. Your rules should align with your unique path, using time as a means to your end.

Coach Ilonka’s Ten Time Rules

1. Don’t say yes if you know you’re going to cancel or not show up. We don’t want to disappoint people. We want to be liked and we want to be fun. I have found myself in many situations where I committed to something I knew I didn’t really want to do and then found myself agonising about how I was going to get myself out of this situation. Saying: “this isn’t for me” or “I cannot commit to being there” for whatever the reason is (please know that you don’t need to give a reason for saying no - no is a complete sentence) is SO liberating. One of the rules I want to set for myself is that I only say yes to things that I am willing to commit to showing up to. Once it’s in my calendar. It’s happening.

2. Schedule time for rest. My brain loves to tell me that I haven’t done enough, That I should be doing more. Rest always fals in the “wasted time” category. It’s almost like only reading non-fiction books because getting lost in some fictional story is an absolute waste of time. It’s because I thought that every action I was taking needed to be connected to some outcome or result. I believed that if it wasn’t productive, it was a waste of time. Here’s the thing though. We need rest. Rest is often put on the backburner because we forget that enough is a decision. Whether you’ve done enough isn’t some magic number. It is what you decide it is. I also know that when I have given my brain permission to switch off, to focus on something else other than work (or being productive), I am able to move though my tasks with much less effort. When I am well rested, I actually have the energy to give to the thing that is in front of me. I am making this a rule because I need to remind myself. My default is go go go. So, setting this as a time rule is a great reminder that “hey…we need rest”.I know that rest is a corner stone of the kind of life I want to create for myself. A life that has space for slow mornings and glorious vacations.

3. Instead of trying to manage your time. Learn the skill of managing your emotions. It’s impossible to manage our time. We all have 24hrs in a day. Yet, some people are able to accomplish much more with their 24 hours than others. Most of us know exactly what we want, we might even set a goal or to to achieve it. Something interesting happens when we decide on a plan of action. When the time comes for us to do it. We don’t feel like it. Something pops up. The time isn’t right. This is because we allow our emotions to drive us. We think feeling bad or feeling uncomfortable is a signal that we should be doing something else. So, we ditch the plan. Our emotions are driven by our thoughts. The good news is, we are in control of our emotions and it is possible to motivate ourselves, to inspire ourselves, and even get things done despite it being uncomfortable. I am setting this time rule for myself as a reminder that I am in the drivers seat and that I can still follow my plan even when it feels uncomfortable. I get to accept how I feel in any given moment AND still take action according to the plan because I have decided that this is what I am going to do. 

4. Plan your week. When I leave what I do in any given moment up to what I feel like doing in that moment, I know I will always choose what’s most comfortable. What I want to create lies outside my comfort zone. You can see the problem here. Planning my week ahead of time allows me to create a plan that is aligned with my bigger vision. And because I create this plan from the future version of myself that isn’t afraid to step out of my comfort zone, I know it is the best plan for where I want to go. I also know that once I reach the time where I need to take action, my brain will freak out and do it’s best to revert back to my old habits. Planning and managing my emotions, and then doing what I planned helps me to establish new habits. Specifically, establishing the habit to do what I said I would do, so that I don’t build belief withing myself that I cannot trust myself.

5. Leverage your time. Do less better. It’s easy to make a never ending to do list and just push to get as many things done as possible. This is what most people do and what I also did before I found coaching. When we focus on the doing of things, only, we are mistaking action for accomplishment. However, you could be doing a ton of things every day and not get any closer to your goal. This rule serves as a reminder that there are things I can do that will help me leverage my time so that I can achieve my goals with less effort, faster. It’s worth spending some time to think about how I can leverage my time. 

6. Protect Your Energy. I want to give energy to those who matter to me. If I am tired and overworked I don’t have energy. I don’t want to give the little scraps of energy I have left at the end of the day to my family, my husband, and even the other passions in my life. I want to be full of energy for whatever or whomever I am showing up to. For this reason I need to protect my energy. This means, not spending energy on things that drain me (like the news…or negative people, or drama). This rule reminds me to protect my energy and be careful where and with whom I choose to spend it.

7. Busy is not a badge of honour. Busy can help us to feel significant. We wear busy like a badge of honour. I don’t want to ever be busy. I want to be purposeful in what I am spending my attention on. I want my clients to feel like I have the space both in my calendar and in my mind for them and what they need.

8. Things don’t take time. They take focus. We often hear that things will get better with time or r that success takes time. In truth, things don’t take time. Things take focus. If I want to create a goal, whether the goal is going to be reached or not has nothing to do with the amount of time that has passed. Time is passing. Regardless of what I do. Whether I reach my goal or get something done will only happen if my focus is on making it happen. This rule serves as a reminder that I am in control of creating the results I want. 

9. Make decisions quickly. Our decisions impact our lives in such a profound way and although I don’t believe we can make a wrong or a right decision, I do believe we can hold ourselves back in major ways by not making decisions quick enough. Imagine what would change if you decided to make decisions quickly. To learn from that decision and then course correct vs. taking an excessive amount of time to decide. How much faster would you learn? How much faster would you know what works and what doesn’t And ultimately reach your goal? The good thing about decisions is they don’t take time either. They simply take information. If you’re struggling to make a decision you can ask yourself whether there is any information that would help you to make this decision with confidence. Once you’ve gathered the relevant information, the only thing left to do is to trust that you’re making the best decision with the information you have available. The trick is to notice when you hold off on making the decision even though you have the information but you don’t trust yourself. 

10. Appreciate the time you have. We only have so much time on this planet. Who knows what’s waiting for us on the other side. This rule serves as a reminder to take it all in. To experience as much of this life that there is to experience and to appreciate every moment I have to make my mark on this world. 

I hope my rules ignite some inspiration for you today. Once you’ve crafted your own Ten Time Rules, post them on Instagram or Facebook and tag me @ilonkarascoaching. I would love to know what yours are!

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